Jehovah's Witnesses=Pyramid Scheme

So it’s been about a year in this house and after 3 encounters with the witnesses of Jehovah I’m starting to get a good picture of where the vital organs are located.  As far as I’m concerned, the jugular is this concept that only 144,000 people are going to “heaven”.   This morning I explained to the well dressed gentlemen what a pyramid scheme was.  Instead of Tupperware they were selling Jehovah and instead of earning a trip to the Bahamas they were trying to collect enough witness points for a ticket to Heaven (which consists of you ballin out of control in the skybox with Jesus where you get to rule over everyone who also sold Tupperware, but not enough).   What about the people who don’t buy/sell Tupperware? Dead.  No heaven.  No Hell.  The End. 

Here’s where the most bat shit crazy person starts to sober up.  This Tupperware company is 100 years old and has had tens of millions of salesmen.  Currently it has millions of salesmen.  How do you know you are not saving up credits for a sold out show?  How many sales have you made today?  Are you confident you are in the 99.8th percentile of all salesmen in history?  How about your wife?  How about your children?

My natural response to this world view is as follows: I don’t like selling Tupperware.  The prospect of being a slave in “Jehovah’s Witness Heaven” (Hell) doesn’t get me that excited, so if I’m headed towards a big nothing when I die I might as well celebrate my birthday, have sex, take drugs, and yes if the end is near HOOK IT UP WITH THAT BLOOD TRANSFUSION!